everything is in between

ahem.
tap.
tap.
this thing on?

it's covered in cobwebs, that's for sure.

there's much to catch up on and i'm about to start by posting lyrics to a song that i suddenly found moving my soul in a way that will likely make sense to only me. life feels...just...so different lately. there are startling moments where adulthood stares me in the eye and others where i'm still 14 and have no idea what i'm doing. regardless, it's changing. the fullness of the last year has come and gone like a breath and i am standing at the bend in the road, remembering the sweet, sweet sounds, smells, laughter and tears of it all.

this song just popped up in itunes a minute ago and arrested my attention from the thank you notes for the most recent funraiser hosted by my workplace that i've been slowly working my way through today.

i feel like much in my life is about to change although much will also remain the same. i want to go curl up on the porch furniture with a glass of iced coffee and linger and reminisce for as long as it takes to sort it out. but i hardly have that kind of time today. thank yous, after all.

so for now:

the end
jason reeves
(i think it's better if you listen. i'll leave that up to you.)

the end is such a scary place to start
everything is torn apart
and i don't know where to go from here
in the end, there's no reason to pretend
i know you won't be back again
i gotta find a way from here..

i don't know where i'll fall down
but i'm sure to hit the ground..

cause it's not over till it's over
every ending's a new beginning
one more chance to get it right
one more chance to get it wrong
its not over till it's over
sometime's nowhere leads to somewhere
and it all starts again
in the end

and it's such a scary place to be
everything is in between
and i don't know where to go from here
in the end i see it's all up to me
to figure out where i should be
im gonna find a way from here

i dont know where i'll fall down
but im sure to hit the ground...

-------
when it's all said and done. no one is leaving. and the only time i'll hit the ground is to fall to my knees and tell my savior all about the things in my heart. the pending changes are all part of his providence anyway. life will be all the richer and fuller for it. i know that he is present in every in between. in the mean time i will try to pace myself in the busyness and savor every moment of the now that is mine.